“How many guys would I have to sleep with to be considered promiscuous… textbook promiscuous? Ten. Eight. Five. And how many girls would a guy my age have to sleep with to be promiscuous? Ten? Twenty? A hundred and nine?”
It draws a clear difference between the norms women and men were/are subjected to, because sexuality and sexual activity is just one part of life and if the same actions are not deemed normal for both genders in this regard there is still a divide which differentiates what one can and cannot do everywhere else. As if it was said that a man can drink as much milk as he wants, when a woman can have a pint and that is it. When in reality; some people are lactose intolerant, do not like the taste are vegan or maybe the opposite; crave it every day or drink it, because it is healthy.
The truth is that everybody is different and cannot be subjected to what is right and wrong by one standard. The decision to drink that glass of milk or to have sex with that person is an individual and personal choice which should not be judged or encouraged one way or the other. Same as no one can say what the other one should feel.
The “divide” is unavoidable. It is naive to assume that thousands of years of culture and evolution can be changed in just our lifetime alone. It might not even be possible in first place. Like you’ve said yourself, can’t really judge people for the way they see milk in their lives, but the same thing applies to the people who can’t help themselves, but be offended/judge and generally disapprove of more “promiscuous” ways. People are not naturally “evil, bigoted , haters”. A person feels emotion and uses whatever the culture they have around them to define those feelings. If a person feels that relationships and sexual relations are something special and something to hold on dearly to, it is only normal to assume that some of the people like that will get angry at anyone who doesn’t view things same way as they do, while some will flat out give up and try to be above the whole issue. It is a very easy way out attitude to assume that everything is sorted out and okay as long as you say that things are OK the way they are, everything is OK, everyone is fine the way they are. I am not saying that it is necessary wrong opinion. I am just trying to encourage you to not be afraid to be more aggressive about your opinion. There is a law to life and the law of righteousness, there is the right way to live/to feel. Our thoughts cloud our feelings, deep inside without any definitions to the feeling, no one is wrong and no one is right. In the end we are all on the same side.
A person judging females about their sexual activity, might just feel protective of the female gender as a whole, and assume that men hurt them or women hurt themselves by doing so.
Is that a bad feeling? Being protective and caring? No it is not, but the worldly definitions attached to it, makes this person a misogynist and a women hater. He isn’t developed enough to realize where his thoughts come from yet, but he isn’t a bad person. That is just one example, but feelings go deep in everyone of us. Fighting the “symptoms” ( the definitions ) is useless fight, to actually win it, must go bravely deeper and pierce through all of the bullshit.
Why does it matter? What made you think about this stuff in the first place? In the face of death, how important is this?
Ask ask ask ask ask. Until there is no more defenses left and your feeling is exposed.