Honestly, if my other birthday post were not in the “let’s talk” category, I would not have put this one here. The simple reason being, that there isn’t something very profound between how I think the life should feel when you are 29, 30 or 31. Maybe that’s just me being all mature now and stuff who knows..
This year for my birthday I am checking in from Manchester in the UK. The place I have never been to before, so it sort of ticks my box for new places on my birthday. Also I was at work for the most part of the day. I actually like being at work, surrounded by people, so nothing sad here. I was showered with love from my colleagues in person and from all the people who matter over the phone. I feel loved and loving, nothing more I could asked of today, really.
I have been asked few times how it feels to be 30 and whether I was afraid and Bla Bla Bla, you know regular stuff. To be honest, I feel excited if anything. I feel like my 20s have been so generous, daring, challenging, yet fun and very very rewarding, full of lessons, mistakes, love and heartbreaks. I am excited to leave that chapter behind and start a brand new one. With a little bit more experience, knowledge and slightly different drive than I what I had when I turned 20. Life is so interesting, unexpected and very very exciting, I feel privileged to have lived another year into this new stage of maturity. I hope I will be blessed with many more in the future.
OK, I do realise I might sound like a preacher here, but I just feel very loved and happy.
I did have one realisation last week leading up to this day and it might have something to do with me completing my magic practice as well, after 28 days of practice, but, here it goes… I realised that there are certain thing I do not have to control. I realised that having something as a goal, doesn’t mean I have to have all the answer as to how to achieve it. If I take a particular example, that would be me wanting to have a family one day and maybe maintaining a semi permanent residence somewhere. I used to think, that I have to know where and when I would want those things to happen, but now, I leave it for “future me” to decide, well “future me” and the “future partner”, since I also realised that decisions like family, should be done as a family.
A colleague of mine told me today, that in your 30s you learn not to give a fuck and in your 40s you really do not give a fuck (pardon my “French”). Funny, but I think this whole sentence is a great example of its meaning.
Anyway, I do feel slightly different right now, lighter in a way and ready to enjoy everything the life has to offer. Bring it on!
Also Happy birthday to everyone who shares this day with me, hope it was as good or even better than mine. Love to you all my birthday twins!
Cheers with a glass full of brand new elephant!